fireincarnate | 31 - Video - Backdated to 4th

[It's amazing, what playing with life and death will take out of you.

She's not sure what she did, exactly - just that she fixed something that was broken, and it took near everything she had. And it came on top of everything else - a month of being helpless, the chaos of the collision, the loss of everyone on Mirror Barge, their own people still missing.

(If she thinks about it took hard - about where Anya might be, if she's even alive - she thinks she might break.)

So she's just been resting. Recovering her strength, regaining her equilibrium. Talking to Morgana helped and hurt in equal measure, but it gave her the push she needed.

She knows how to put on a good face - to look calm and assured, even when she's twisted up inside. Her smile is warm and open, lit by the fire dancing round her fingers.]

I know we're all recovering right now. For those who don't know - I'm something of a therapist. If anyone wants to talk, I'm here.

[Current Patients]

How are you doing? Do you need anything?

[Wichita]

[Her smile turns rueful.] I'm sorry it took me this long to check in. Did you come through everything okay?

[Emperor]

[This is the first time she hesitates. She's not sure how she feels, now, about the choices she made on Mirror Barge. About how she's changed and what that means. About what his goal really was, in guiding her.

But ignoring it would be cowardly - and whatever his reasons, he helped her. He made her feel strong, secure, in ways she didn't think possible.]

I wanted to thank you. [Yes, that's true enough.] I know you had a bigger agenda, there, but I - I think I would have been a lot worse, without you there.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Her eyebrows arch, as she studies her.]

Do what?

Give you hope?

[ she hums, like agreeing with words would be too telling or something ]

Not for something like that.

Something like happiness. Like a real life.

You deserve that, you know.

No. [ her expression shifts a bit, somewhere between annoyed and outright pissed ] I don't care what the hell this place is, nobody could just make all that go away. It's impossible, and it's a waste of time trying to play it like it isn't.

[ a waste of time to try and play me ]

You don't have to. You can just take her and leave, to any world you want - a world just likes yours used to be, or completely different.

Or you could become a Warden, make a deal. I did, and I saved my best friend.

Another world? You can't expect me to believe that? If something like that were possible, if the Admiral had any interest in actually helping us out, why didn't he bring her here too? Instead of splitting us up.

Do you really think the Barge would be that much safer for her?

[She's quiet, for a moment.] Wichita - Inmates tend to end up here when they die.

Dunno. I just know I'd feel better with her here.

[ woops, super selfish. ]

Yeah, I've heard that. Not sure I believe it, though.

I understand. [Selfish, maybe - but she knows how much better she'd feel with Scott or Ororo here.]

And, well - I know for a fact, personally, that it can take people after death.

I meant that I don't believe I'm actually dead.

[ she's already told Cassel about this, but saying it again, thinking about the possibility, is still freaking scary ]

What's the last thing you remember?

Falling asleep at Bill Murray's house. We were safe there, there's no way-

[ zombies attacked without them waking up to deal with it ]

It's easiest to get hurt when you think you're safe. [There's something tired and bitter in her voice, now, even as she tries to keep it soft, tender.]</small

[ that gets a mild stinkeye look though ]

In my world there's no such thing as a subtle death anymore. I mean, I would know.

But there are quick ones.

31 - Video - Backdated to 4th

[private]

[private]

Re: [private]

[private]

[private]

[private]

[private]

[private]

Re: [private]

[private]

[private]

[private]

[private]

[private]

[private]